Ever just feel TIRED? I mean, don't want to do anything, can't seem to get moving type tired? A list a mile long, and you need to be writing two different books, and revising a third, and all you find yourself doing is staring at the screen, or playing solitaire?
That's where I'm at right now. I need to be three people, and I'm just not able to stretch to the extent I need to. I've always been able to before, so what's different now?
Hmm....let's see....maybe it has something to do with the fact that I'm over 50 and it's hard for me to admit I don't have the intensely high energy level I used to have?
I'm leaving for a church retreat tomorrow at 2:00 in the afternoon, and returning home about the same time, and I'm kicking myself for signing up. I look at my house that needs cleaning, the laundry that needs done, the mud patch in the front of the house that needs lawn seed spread, the flower bed that needs weeding, and the book projects piling up...and I wonder how I can possibly take the time to go.
But then I think...can I afford NOT to go? Maybe God has something planned in this 24 hrs away that I need to hear. Maybe He wants to meet me in a way He's been unable to do at home, at the pace I'm running. Maybe....well, maybe HE set this as a divine appointment and I need to quit kicking myself, and go with an attitude of expectation.
Okay...I can do that, I think. I'm going to put aside the stress for 24 hrs and allow God to speak to me in whatever way He needs to. I guess we all need times like this. Time to slow down and allow God to get our attention. There might not be any huge revelation while I'm gone. I might not hear the speaker say anything I haven't heard a dozen times before. But if I connect with my Lord at an intimate level, it will be worth it all.