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Saturday, April 28, 2007

16 Ways to Open the Door to Your Husband's Heart

16 Ways to Open the Door to Your Husband's Heart

From the book "When He doesn't Believe" by Nancy Kennedy

1. Go to his softball games (or whatever he's interested in) and pay attention.

2. Tell him often that what he does at work is important to you.

3. Never belittle or trivialize his work.

4. Ask questions about his job. Learn what he does.

5. Determine what your husband does well and provide opportunities for him to perform and succeed. Ask him if he would: glue a chair leg, move furniture, change a doorknob, plan a trip, etc.

6. Say thank you often.

7. Watch your interactions with other men and avoid situations that could be misinterpreted.

8. Ask his advice and then take it. If you're not willing to do that, it's better not to ask in the first place.

9. Ask for his help.

10. Build him up in front of your kids.

11. Never correct him in public.

12. Dream with him, even if you think his dreams are far-fetched. That's what makes them dreams.

13. Touch him often, especially when you're listening to him talk.

14. Be loyal.

15. Enjoy sex.

16. Pray and ask God for creative ways to affirm your husband's unique maleness. Then go and do it.

Friend, if your husband is going through a time of midlife darkness, know that even in this, even when it looks bleakest, God is still able to give you everything you need to get through this trial and to equip you to be a minister of his grace to your spouse. This is the time to know the best thing - perhaps the only thing - you can do is crawl up on the Father's lap and let him hold you as you cry tears of confusion and helplessness for your beloved.

Stay close to the Lord, read up on the subject, get counseling for yourself, and pray like crazy for that man of yours as you give him time and space to work things through. By now you know that a wise woman knows that it's God and God alone who does it all. He's the one who draws her husband to himself, in his time, in his way, utterly and completely. And as she allows her husband to discover the claims of Christ for himself, when the time comes that he senses the irresistible grace of God beckoning him, it won't be just lip service, but a genuine heart change. It's the way men are. It's the way God works.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Six Marriage Killing Lies

6 Marriage Killing Lies

From the book "The Lies We Believe" by Dr. Chris Thurman

1. It's All Your Fault.- Secular Truth: It takes two to tango. Marriage problems are rarely one person's fault.-

Theological Truth: Romans 2:1: You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things.

2. If It Takes Hard Work, We Must Not Be Right for Each Other.- Secular Truth: Hard work in marriage is the norm, not the exception. It means you and your partner need each other's help to work out personality flaws and weaknesses.

- Theological Truth: 1 Corinthians 7:28b: But those who marry will face many troubles in this life.

3. You Can and Should Meet All My Needs. - Secular Truth: No one person can meet all your needs. Your needs can best be met through a variety of sources. -

Theological Truth: Philippians 4:19: And my God will meet all your needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus.

4. You Owe Me. - Secular Truth: Your spouse doesn't really "owe" you anything for what you do. You do what you do because, at some level, you choose to do it. You aren't owed anything for what you choose to do.-

Theological Truth: 1 Peter 5:5b: Clothe yourselves with humility because "God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble."

5. I Shouldn't Have to Change.- Secular Truth: Marriage requires change. People who refuse to change, stagnate themselves and their marriages. The important issue is deciding what we need to change about ourselves and what we don't.-

Theological Truth: Hebrews 12:14a: Make every effort to live in peace with all and to be holy.

6. You Should Be Like Me.- Secular Truth: Every person is unique and can't be a carbon copy of anyone else. It would be boring if it weren't that way.-

Theological Truth: 1 Corinthians 12:18-19: But in fact God has arranged the parts in the body, every one of them, just as He wanted them to be. If they were all one part, where would the body be?

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Marriage Memo And Computers!---Article

I've found a wonderful article that ties in the subject of marriage with the time we spend on the computer. Uh-oh, say you die hard computer junkies! Maybe you don't want to read this! Yep, you do! Trust me, it's worth it!

Marriage Memo
Our growing relationship ... with our computers.

by Dave BoehiIt

It seems as if I rarely go more than a couple of weeks without finding something in the news about another new survey on some aspect of marriage and family. One of the latest was sent to me in an e-mail last week. An article in the Washington Times reported:

In a new survey of 1,001 adults, 65 percent said they spent more time with their computers than their spouse or significant other, according to Los Angeles-based Kelton Research, which released the findings yesterday.

50 Nights of Family Fun by Mark Whitlock. Order 50 Nights of Family Fun by Mark Whitlock.

The computer/user "relationship" is intensifying, the survey found, noting that 84 percent say we've grown more dependent on our computers in the last three years. Harmony is not a built-in feature either: 52 percent of us take our computer's failures personally, feeling anger, sadness or alienation if the computer did not cooperate or perform well. An additional 19 percent admitted they have wanted to strike their computers.

On one hand, I don’t think it should be too shocking that many of us spend so much time with our computers—after all, we work for hours each day and computers are a primary tool of the work place. But the survey does point to the remarkable way our lives have changed in the last decade. The rise of the Internet has transformed our computers into a central hub for communication, research, shopping, media storage, and entertainment. The more we use the Internet, the more we depend on it.

Even apart from work hours, I suppose we would be surprised if we added up the total number of hours we spend on the computer (and on the Web). According to the record on my home computer, in the last two days I totally ignored my wife, Merry, as I read newspaper and magazine articles, purchased a calendar, checked my bank account, and—in my never-ending pursuit of trivial information—looked up the results of the 1969 Minnesota state high school hockey final between Edina and Warroad.

Of course, Merry totally ignored me as she spent hours on the Internet looking up information on crafts, curtains, restaurants, and wedding preparations (our oldest daughter is engaged). She wrote dozens of e-mails, and visited a site with information about “Obagi skin care.” When we spend so much time on computers, it’s understandable that we take computer failures personally.

As one therapist noted in the Washington Times article, “As computers become increasingly pervasive in our lives, our relationships with them can begin to seem almost as important as a relationship with a significant other. When problems then occur with the computer, it often leaves people feeling frustrated or helpless.” I can relate—it doesn’t take much to get me frustrated. (“Why is this web page taking so long to download? I thought this was supposed to be high speed Internet! This is inexcusable!”)

Though I speak a bit lightly about the Internet, I am well aware of how many people disregard their families while spending hours looking up information, talking with people in chat rooms, and participating in fantasy games. And then there is online pornography, which damages families on an entirely different level.

As much as we enjoy the Internet, it’s time for many of us to realize how easily this relatively new medium can consume us. It may seem odd to think that you can have a relationship with a computer, but that’s what it is. You need to decide if that relationship is more important than the one you have with your spouse.

And now I need to end this column and get off the computer. Merry wants to check her e-mail.

Dave Boehi is a senior editor at FamilyLife and editor of the HomeBuilders Couples Series® and The Family Room. He has written one book, I Still Do: Stories of Lifelong Love and Marriage, and co-authored two others. Dave and his wife, Merry, have two daughters and live in Little Rock, Ark.

Saturday, April 21, 2007

Being a Generous Wife

Here are a few great tips to help you become a more generous wife. I've garnered these from a great daily post that comes to me online. I hope you'll enjoy!

Take care to protect your husband's special places in the house. As women, we generally preside over most of the spaces in the house, decorating, cleaning and arranging them as we see fit. We have lots of places in the home that we use regularly. Men have much less space that they call their own.

Maybe your husband sees his office or desk as his domain. Maybe the basement is his favorite place. Or maybe he just has a special chair. Whatever it is, protect it! Keep the kids' toys and your own things away, keep the area clean, and give him time to decompress alone in his spot when he needs it!

Pray for wisdom for your husband in terms of balance in his life. Does he have enough rest, play time, work time, family time, etc. Getting sidetracked or too busy might cause him to miss out on what he needs for a healthy, balanced life. Ask God to give him eyes to see how to make time for what he needs.

A tip today, prayerfully consider your friends. Are they encouraging you to build your marriage? Are you encouraging them? What do you need to do to help your friendships be more supportive of marriage in general?

Be willing to consider your husband's perspective. Generally speaking, there are a number of ways that a given thing can be done. If your husband wants to do something a certain way because it makes better sense to him or is more convenient for him, why not? Do voice any concerns, of course, but make room for his perspectives, choices, etc. They are as valid as your own and need to be given consideration too, especially where they effect his time and energy.

Be accepting of his friends. When you respect his choice of friends you are respecting him. Unless they are seriously leading him into trouble, take the time to be polite to them, encourage them and, whatever the situation, pray for them.

When was the last time you gave your husband a REALLY SEXY card? How about today? Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest, so is my beloved among the young men. Song of Songs 2:3a NAS

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Ten Things Guys Wish Women Knew...Part 2

If you missed the first half of this article, please scroll down just a bit and you'll find the first 5 points of 10 things guys wish women knew about them.

This is the final installment...I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!

6. Sex means more than sex. When men feel their wives desire them sexually, it has a profound effect on the rest of their lives. It gives them an increasing sense of confidence and well-being that carries over into every other area of his life.

The flipside of this coin also carries a profoundly negative affect. When a husband feels rejected sexually, he not only feels his wife is rejecting him physically, but that she is somehow rejecting his life as a husband, provider and man. This is why making sex a priority in marriage is so incredibly important!

7. Men struggle with visual temptation. This means the vast majority of men respond to visual images when it comes to women. And, this doesn't just mean the guys with wandering eyes. Even the most godly husband cannot avoid noticing a woman who dresses in a way that draws attention to her body.

Even if it is just a glance, these visual images are stored away in the male brain as a sort of "visual rolodex" that will reappear without any warning. Men can choose whether to dwell on these images and memories or dismiss them, but they can't control when these images appear.

8. Men enjoy romance, but doubt their skills to be romantic. True, many men appear to be unromantic clods, but it doesn't mean that they want to be that way! Men want to be romantic, but they just doubt their ability to pull it off. They are plagued by internal hesitations, perceiving the risk of humiliation and failure as too high. Wives can do a great deal to increase their husbands' confidence in their romantic skills through encouragement and redefining what romance looks like.

For example, a wife may balk when her husband asks her to go along to the hardware store, but it's likely that he's asking because he sees it as a time they can get away as a couple and hang out together. What's not romantic about that?

9. Men care about their wife's appearance. This isn't saying that all men want their wives to look like the latest supermodel. What men really want is to know that their wives are making an effort to take care of themselves (and not letting themselves go) because it matters to them (the husbands!). Husbands appreciate the efforts their wives make to maintain their attractiveness.

10. Men want their wives to know how much they love them. This was the number one response of men. Men aren't confident in their ability to express this, but they love their wives dearly. Men want to show how much they love their wives and long for them to understand this fact.

Copyright © 2006 Jim Burns, Used with permission. Read more from Jim at homeword.comIn response to the overwhelming needs of parents and families, Jim Burns founded HomeWord (formerly YouthBuilders) in 1985. HomeWord is a Christian organization designed to provide assistance to adults worldwide as they help young people make wise decisions and lead positive, vibrant, Christian lifestyles. Multiplication and Leverage: While absolutely committed to young people, HomeWord equips parents, grandparents and youth leaders; those who daily reach out to kids. By equipping adults, and leveraging those adults to reach kids, HomeWord reaches more young people more cost effectively. Read more at

Monday, April 16, 2007

My Book Cover Is Ready!

I'm excited!!! I just got the file with the picture of my new front cover and I love it!

To give you a little background, Kregel Publications was SO gracious and allowed me to submit several different photos I took that I felt were a good representation of my book. They liked what I sent and decided to use this one. The color and angle have been tweaked a bit and I'm so happy with the job they've done.

My understanding is the book will be posted on and several other online book sites for pre-ordering by the end of this month at the earliest, but could be up to mid May on some sites.

Watch for it and I hope you'll be willing to send the link to friends and family who might be interested in buying a copy. If this book is successful, they'll probably be offering me a contract on the second one, so any help will be SO appreciated from all you wonderful readers.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

10 Things Guys Wish Women Knew about Men

10 Things Guys Wish Women Knew about Men
By Jim Burns

It is likely no surprise to you that God has wired women and men differently. We all recognize some of these differences, but others often hide in plain sight.

Shaunti Feldhahn, a nationally syndicated newspaper columnist, author and speaker recently wrote a fantastic book, For Women Only: What You Need to Know About the Inner Lives of Men. In it, she recounts the surprising truths she learned about men after interviewing more than one thousand of them. Not long ago, Jim Burns had the opportunity to interview Shaunti for his radio broadcast, HomeWord with Jim Burns. In their discussion, they spoke about ten things guys wish women knew about men

1. Men would rather feel unloved than inadequate and disrespected. Husbands need to know that their wives respect them both privately and publicly. Men thrive when they know that their wives trust them, admire them and believe in them. Shaunti Feldhahn's research indicated that men would rather sense the loss of loving feelings from their wives than to be disrespected by them.

2. A man's anger is often a response to feeling disrespected by his wife. When a husband becomes angry with his wife, he may not come out and say, "You're disrespecting me!" But, there is a good likelihood that he is feeling stung by something his wife has done which he considers disrespectful and humiliating.

3. Men are insecure. Men are afraid that they aren't cutting it in life -- not just at work, but at home, in their role as a husband. They may never vocalize this, but inwardly, they are secretly vulnerable. The antidote? Affirmation. To men, affirmation from their wives is everything! If they don't receive this affirmation from their wives, they'll seek it elsewhere. When they receive regular and genuine affirmation from their wives (not flattery, by the way), they become much more secure and confident in all areas of their lives.

4. Men feel the burden of being the provider for their family. Intellectually, it doesn't matter how much or little a man makes, or whether or not his wife makes more or less money in her career. Men simply bear the emotional burden of providing for their family. It's not a burden they've chosen to bear. Men are simply wired with this burden. As such, it is never far from their minds and can result in the feeling of being trapped. While wives cannot release their husbands from this burden, they can relieve it through a healthy dose of appreciation, encouragement and support.

5. Men want more sex. Everyone's natural response to this is probably, "Duh!" But, that response is probably for the wrong reason. We primarily assume that men want more sex with their wives due to their physical wiring (their "needs"). But, surprisingly, Shaunti Feldhahn's research showed that the reason men want more sex is because of their strong need to be desired by their wives. Men simply need to be wanted. Regular, fulfilling sex is critical to a man's sense of feeling loved and desired.

The next five points will be added on my next post, so stand by for more!

Copyright © 2006 Jim Burns, Used with permission. Read more from Jim at homeword.comIn response to the overwhelming needs of parents and families, Jim Burns founded HomeWord (formerly YouthBuilders) in 1985. HomeWord is a Christian organization designed to provide assistance to adults worldwide as they help young people make wise decisions and lead positive, vibrant, Christian lifestyles.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Letting Your Husband Know You're Proud Of Him, Part Two

I'm finishing up this subject today, and either Friday or Saturday I'll post a new one, on Ten Things Your Husband Wishes You Knew About sure to check back ladies, it's a good one!
Letting Your Husband Know You're Proud of Him by Sabrina Beasley

6. Resolve conflicts in private...and avoid body language that undermines your husband in public. We all get upset with our husbands at times; that's part of marriage. But don't drag it out in front of others. Your friends won't see you make up later, and they'll be left with a lasting impression of a wife's disrespect for her husband.

I've been guilty of this, most often when bitterness from an earlier dispute carries over into our plans with friends that evening. When I consider my heart, I find that instead of love, my motive for huffiness is revenge, and deep down inside I hope to hurt him like he's hurt me. So I might roll my eyes at something he says, or elbow him, or put on a look of disbelief. Body language like this quietly undermines your husband in front of others. He may not know what you're trying to say, but he'll read it to mean, "I'm not proud of you, and I don't respect you."

7. Take his side. There's no one that's easier for a wife to pick on than her husband. You are all too familiar with his annoying little habits, and the areas where he needs improvement. But when others start to pick on him, take his side. The jokes might seem innocent, but if you make fun of your husband publicly, you are choosing to degrade him when you could esteem him.

The next time your husband is the brunt of teasing, stick up for him by talking about his good qualities and abilities. You don't have to act offended, but instead act proud of who he is and what he has accomplished. As a result, you will show your honey that even when you are given a choice you still choose to give him the respect that he deserves.

8. Cheer him on. Have you ever wondered why there are cheerleaders at a football game? They aren't helping the players throw the ball, run faster, or play smarter, but their job is just as important. They encourage the players by letting them know that someone believes they can win. Husbands need cheerleaders, too. They don't need someone to fix their problems for them or even tell them how to do things. As a matter of fact, to try to fix their problems can insult their masculinity. What they need are wives who believe in them.

A great example of this kind of cheerleading comes from Meredith White of Longview, Tex. When her husband, Faber, was going through medical school and working long hours, Meredith knew he was struggling just to make it through each day. So she started "What's it Wednesdays" and would plan a weekly gift or surprise for her sweetheart. "Every week I looked forward to Wednesdays for that reason," Faber says. " It definitely helped me through a particularly hard time in my schooling."

9. Be interested in his projects. Every man I know has a passion for something, from watching sports to putting together model airplanes. My husband likes to play Fantasy Football from August to February. I have to admit there are times when I force myself to keep from rolling my eyes at the mention of the word "football" because I want him to know that I support his desire to fellowship with his friends and take part in clean sportsmanship. This all boils down to starting a conversation with your husband.

If he is busy researching in his office, sit down and ask him about his newest venture. "What are you working on, Sweetheart?" is a good way to begin. He may give you a short, non-descriptive answer like "Oh, just some stuff for Fantasy Football." Then that's your cue to start asking questions. Ask him how he's been playing, how he plans to improve, and don't forget to end with an encouraging word about how, "he's going to blow them all away at the finals this year."

10. Teach your children to respect him. It's easy to openly criticize your husband in front of your children, but when was the last time you boasted about him instead? Your words of admiration will not only make your children feel more secure as they witness their parents' love, it will also encourage them to speak as highly of their father as you do. In addition, when your kids, particularly as teenagers, make comments that disrespect their father, be sure to let them know that such speech is unacceptable. This is important for the unity of your marriage. And when your husband hears about your comments, he will feel a renewed sense of appreciation for a wife who demands his respect.

Taken from the September 2005 issue of The Family Room, FamilyLife's online magazine. Copyright© 2005. All rights reserved. Used by permission

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Tricia Goyer---Author of Historical Fiction

Today I have the honor of interviewing Tricia Goyer, an outstanding author in the Christian Fiction industry whose newest book, The Valley of Betrayal, just released. It's available on or, so be sure to pick up your copy soon!
First, I’d love to have you introduce yourself to my readers, in case someone isn’t familiar with your work. How long have you been writing and what books have been published so far?

I first started writing in 1993, when I was pregnant with my third child. A friend at church was writing a novel and something clicked when she told me about it. (Cindy Martinusen now as five novels published!)

Looking back, I realized I had the heart of a writer before that. I LOVED to read. I made up all types of stories in my head. I won a few essay contests in high school, but it took a friend’s encouragement to “click.”

I was at Mt. Hermon my first time in 1994. I was 22-years-old and pregnant with my 3rd child. I had some "articles" I wrote. Amazingly, I submitted them, and Light and Life bought one of my articles! I had to do some rewriting, but they bought it. So, basically I sold the very first thing I ever submitted . . . but I didn't sell anything else for 2 1/2 years. I think that was just God's way of telling me I was on the right track!

I never planned on writing historical fiction. I wanted to write contemporary romances. Then in 2000, I was with Cindy and another writer friend, Anne de Graaf in Austria. They were researching books, and I was along for the ride. BUT I was the one who got a novel idea, after talking to an Austrian historian. The historian’s true stories about the liberation of Gusen and Mauthausen concentration camps sparked my novel idea. The idea led to attending two WWII reunions and interviewing veterans. The veterans’ stories led to more novels. The rest, as they say, is history!

2007) My Life, Unscripted
(2007) A Valley of Betrayal
(2007) A Shadow of Treason
(2006) Generation NeXt Parenting
(2006) Arms of Deliverance
(2005) Dawn of a Thousand Nights
(2004) Night Song
(2004) Life Interrupted
(2004) 10 Minutes to Showtime
(2003) From Dust and Ashes
(2000) Mealtime Moments

Your current book, Valley of Betrayal, is set in pre-WWII Spain. What triggered the desire to write about Spain’s history, and did you get to go ‘on site’ to do any research?

When I was researching for my novel, Arms of Deliverance, one of the autobiographies I read was from a man who was a B-17 bomber pilot over Europe--but before that he was an American volunteer for The Spanish Civil War. I had never heard of this war before, which happened right before WWII in Spain. I started researching and I was soon fascinated. Some people call it "the first battle of WWII" because it's where that Nazis first tried their hand at modern warfare.

I started by researching this time in history, briefly, then I started thinking of unique characters that had an impact during that time. For example, characters from my other novels have been medics, war correspondents, artists, prisoners, etc. To me it's the people that makes the story (and history) come alive. For this series I dove into the lives of an American artist, a few International volunteers, a Basque priest, and a German pilot. I research the real people first, and then the plot for my novel builds. Soon, I have to make myself stop researching to start writing. Research can be addictive!

Amazingly, I WAS able to interview veterans from The Spanish Civil War. They are in their 90s! I mostly communicated with them through email, since many of them live overseas. One man, who was very helpful, passed away while I was writing A Valley of Betrayal. Yet, he was very excited that I was writing about his experiences.I also received help from many researchers and historians, and I bought up every book I can find on The Spanish Civil War.

Unfortunately I didn’t get to travel to Spain for my research…someday! Instead I dove into the books. I was also blessed to interview men who were there, and get the help/insight from a missionary friend who currently lives in Spain. ...

What was your favorite thing about writing this book? Any unusual experiences during your research or writing, that you’d care to share?

This book was very challenging because I knew nothing about The Spanish Civil War before I started. Yet, I felt sure that God was leading me to write these books, and God (again) taught me to trust Him. When He gives me an idea for a novel it is so BIG. I mean there is so much to pull together. Yet, God has shown me time and time again that He is faithful. He gives me ideas, leads me to the right research books, and even brings people into my life to help me!

One example with this book is that God brought someone also to help. A man named Norm Goyer contacted me because his was working on his family tree and he wanted to know if we were related. We weren’t related, but Norm ended up being a airplane expert and consultant for movies. Norm ended up helping me with research on my German pilot in Spain. I think it was an awesome gift from God!

This again shows me that what ever God brings before me, He also has the power to help me succeed.

I see this is the first book in a series called Chronicles of the Spanish Civil War. Can you give us a peek into the sequel and any idea when it might release?

Sure I can! A Valley of Betrayal will be followed by A Shadow of Treason and A Whisper of Freedom. Both books follow the same characters and the same storyline. In fact, book two begins the SAME DAY as book one leaves off! The plot thickens, of course, and the stakes get higher with each book. I'd loved to be able write more stories in series in the future, I had a blast!

A Shadow of Treason will be out September 1, 2007 and A Whisper of Freedom in February of 2008!

If you had to compare your writing to two or three other Christian writers who deal with historical fiction, which would they be? Particularly any that the avid Christian fiction reader might recognize?

Well, it's scary to compare ... because I'm a little biased :-) But if I had to I'd say Bodie Thoene (I hear this a lot!), Jack Cavanaugh, and B.J. Hoff. We have the same well-researched, well-written style ... or so I'd like to think!

What do you feel sets your writing apart from other current writers of historical fiction?

Often, I have reviewers state that I write about the "lesser known" aspects of WWII. For example, I rarely have a major battle, instead I focus on people or events that few have heard about.

Which character did you most enjoy writing in Valley of Betrayal and why? Which one did you have the hardest time writing and why?

Wow. That's a hard question. Hmmm ... I think it was Father Manuel--mainly because he was SO different from any other character I've ever written. He is a Basque priest who is seeing his country in war yet sees little transformation in the spiritual condition of the people he served. He was VERY interesting to me.

One of my characters, Deion, is part of the Communist party. Today's reader has one view of what that means, but in the 1930s there was hope found there. In a country that was still segregated, the idea of "equality of men" was a huge draw, especially for African Americans.

Do any of the characters reflect you in any way?

Definitely Mary in Arms of Deliverance. Mary was born to a single mom. She later met her dad who was the editor of a major NY newspaper. After that Mary tried to earn her dad's love/attention by taking on dangerous, overseas assignments during WWII. I had the same type of experience (except for the dangerous assignment parts). Only a few people know about my biological dad (until now!), but having them read that novel was like giving them a glimpse into my secret diary--the emotions were THAT real.

Can you share your long term plans for your fiction career? Any more series in the works?

Currently, I have (let me see) five historical fiction ideas that will soon be on the desk of my editors. I have many, many more historical fiction ideas than I have time to write, so I cast my ideas out there and see which will sprout! My plan is to write at least one historical fiction novel a year. I hope my editors agree!
I'm sure they will, Tricia, I know I'm looking forward to seeing more from you in the future. Thank-you for taking your valuable time away from writing to share with my readers.

Sunday, April 8, 2007

Coming Soon---An Interview with Tricia Goyer

I'm honored to announce that I'll be interviewing Tricia Goyer on Tuesday, April 10th here on my blog. Her novel, A Valley of Betrayal released recently and we'll be talking about it, as well as her writing in general.

A Valley of Betrayal, Book One in the Chronicles of The Spanish Civil War series by Tricia Goyer (Moody Publishing). For reasons beyond her control, Sophie finds herself alone in the war torn Spanish countryside and pledges to make the plight of the Spanish people known around the world through the power of art.

Here's just a little bit about Tricia, for those of you who might not be familiar with her work. She is the author of five novels, two non-fiction books, and one children's book. Tricia was named Mount Hermon Christian Writers Conference "Writer of the Year" in 2003. In 2005, her book Life Interrupted was a finalist for the Gold Medallion. Also in 2005, her novel Night Song won ACFW's Book of the Year for Long Historical Romance. In 2006, her novel Dawn of a Thousand Nights also won Book of the Year for Long Historical.

She's written over 250 articles for national publications and hundreds of Bible Study notes for the Women of Faith Study Bible. Tricia lives in Montana with her husband and three kids where she homeschools, leads children's church, and mentors teenage mothers.

Tricia has three books that will be out soon ...My Life Unscripted (Thomas Nelson, Children's Division), Summer 2007

A Shadow of Treason (Moody Publishing), Fall 2007

Generation NeXt Marriage (Multnomah), January 2008

Saturday, April 7, 2007

And the WINNER Is-----

We have TWO winners this time, for a signed copy of my new book releasing this fall, The Other Daughter.

I did my drawing from the 26 names who left comments on my blog or on my ShoutLife site, and picked my winner. Then I realized I'd missed putting the names of the people in the hat who'd left a comment during March on my author web site, so had to do another one. I'll be doing this again in late April through the end of May, so be sure to drop by and sign up again!

The winners---drum roll----from my Shoutlife Site, Sharon!

and from here on my blog and she also dropped by my author site-------another author, Delia Latham. You can find her blog addy in my list of fellow authors blogs.

Congratulations to you both!

Wednesday, April 4, 2007

Letting Your Husband Know You're Proud of Him

If it has been a while since you've shown your husband that you're proud of him, don't let another day go by without communicating your admiration. Here are ten suggestions to help.

Just say it. Those five little words, "I'm so proud of you" are sometimes difficult to spit out, especially if it has been a while since you've said them. They may feel awkward at first, even "cheesy," but once you begin, this little phrase won't seem so strange anymore. But don't just leave it at "I'm proud of you." Tell him why: "I'm so proud of you for spending time with our son. That means a lot to him and to me."

2. Brag about him
to others. If you have children, you already have plenty of bragging practice. If little Suzie wins the county spelling bee, you put her trophy in a place of honor and tout that your little girl is a genius. But we wives often forget that our husbands crave the same type of praise.

Did you show off the new paint job he did in the bathroom? Did you buy a frame for the certificate he received at work? Have you shown your friends the lawn or garden he nurtured all summer? While bragging to others, don't forget to include his parents. Not only will they feel proud to know that their son is a great husband, but they will also feel encouraged that his wife recognizes it.

Dream with him. Early in our marriage, my husband would often tell me of his visions of entrepreneurship. I'll never forget when he told me about his plans to build a hotdog stand. He even had a name picked out and a logo developed. He also had several other business ideas in mind, like a coupon book and a local magazine—he thought they were ingenious ideas that were eventually going to make him rich, rich, rich! Of course, all I could see was my security flying out of the door.

But then my mother's voice called back in my mind, echoing her premarital advice, "Remember to dream with him." Men often enjoy dreaming about the future, even when it's not currently possible, while women tend to think in the present, counting costs, roadblocks, and impossibilities. I used to think that if I allowed David to dream that I was non-verbally giving my permission for him to begin. In reality, I've found that the opposite is true. He actually begins to see the practical side of things for himself.

Listen to your husband when he tells stories in public...and don't correct him! Have you ever been at a friend's house when your husband tells a story wrong? He may get most of it right, but he leaves out some interesting sideline or he gets the person's name wrong. The standard response is, "No, that's not the way it went. Here, let me tell it." And then he's left looking like a moron in front of your friends.

Let me challenge you to stop disagreeing with your husband on the little things. There may be times when he gets some details wrong, but no one is taking score about who gets the fine points right most of the time.

Look him in the eyes and smile. Just the way you look and react to your husband can give the impression that you are honored to be his wife. Think about what it would mean to him if you stopped what you were doing, looked him in the eyes, listened and smiled. This action sends the message, "It pleases me to spend undistracted time with you and to hear what's going on in your life."

Looks like I'll make this in three posts, rather than the last one will be in a day or two. Take care and don't forget to hug your husband tonight!

By Sabrina Beasley

Taken from the September 2005 issue of The Family Room, FamilyLife's online magazine. Copyright© 2005. All rights reserved. Used by permission

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